you may return here once you realize you are always here

If you come to one of my yoga classes, you'll most likely hear me say something like this: "every posture (or asana) does not truly begin until you want to get out of it." I ask the people taking my class to think about what this means for their yoga practice. Some of the postures are really uncomfortable and all that we want to do is move into the next posture to find some sort of relief. But, I challenge myself and my students to stay with the discomfort, to breathe into it. "Every posture does not truly begin until we want to get out of it." 


I really like this lesson. The first time I heard it, it rocked my world. My practice was changed forever. I learned the importance of breath and how we can accomplish almost anything we put our minds to if we just breathe. I also learned that I was stronger than I thought I was. I think we all could use that knowledge.


The idea of burning through discomfort and coming out stronger on the other side is really beautiful and promotes so much growth, but it can only be done with a compassionate heart. While teaching last night, I began to think, is it really a good lesson to teach people to sit with discomfort? Or am I hurting them? To be honest, I probably heard this lesson so many times before, but it was not until one class about three years ago that I actually heard it. I think we begin to understand important lessons once we are ready to make a change. So much of what we call wisdom is really just a shift in perspective. We have all that we need already within us, we just have to realize that it is already here. This reminds me of a quote by T.S. Eliot:


We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time. 

I also like to think of this concept as a way for people to find God in their lives. I think it's fair to say that most of us have had those experiences of love, a rush of emotion that takes over and for just a moment, we are able to see the world in a whole new way. This love, I would argue, is God. Many of us have had a glimpse of Him in our lives, but sometimes it's hard to have faith that He is always here, within us. I'm thinking that the realization that God is always present is truly just a radical change in perspective as well:


"At that moment of realization (that union with God is always present), that's when God let me go, let me slide through His fingers with this last compassionate, unspoken message: 


You may return here once you have fully come to understand that you are always here." 


-Elizabeth Gilbert




You may return here once you realize you are always here. How cool is that? 


So this is all great. But, back to the yoga point. After class last night, I came home and started reading one of my books about yoga. I read the definition of "asana" (the physical practice of yoga), the definition from the Yoga Sutra is "The posture should be steady and comfortable." Hmmm...is that really what I've been teaching? I think in our Western mindset we tend to go to yoga for a really great workout, for Madonna arms and a killer core. That's a great side affect of yoga, but is it the main intention? No. 


I thought about this definition and came to realize that by using the exercise mantra of "no pain, no gain" we are only harming ourselves with self-judging internal dialogue. I read, "there was no way that I could be harsh toward myself and, at the same time, be compassionate to others. I realized also that the process of silently putting myself down was actually a form of egoism." This got me thinking that if I expect more of myself than I do of others, I am actually saying that I am better than others, and therefore must perform at a higher level. This doesn't mean that I should not set goals for myself, but it is how I react to my inability to meet the goals that is important. When I let myself get into the mode of self-judgement, I no longer am present; essentially, I no longer am practicing yoga. When I live free from self-judgement, I am able to live "steady and comfortable," present to my own life. When I live this way, I am living fully. 


What if we all thought about ourselves like this? Next time someone gives you a compliment, smile and say "thank you." If you tell yourself that you have to work out for an hour everyday, give yourself a break if you haven't been keeping up with that goal. If you tell yourself you're not eating sugar for the next week, and find yourself eating an oreo, let it go. Be easy on yourself. Be tender yet bold. Be as forgiving to yourself as you are to the people around you. Allow your true self to shine through. Don't be ashamed of your greatness, don't shrink down and hide your light. If we allow our own light to shine, we in turn allow others to do the same:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world.

There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine.

We were born to make manifest the glory that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 

As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

-Mariane Williamson

So my challenge to you is not to try hard but to try easy, be gentle and kind to yourself. Stay present to your own life by letting go of self-judgement. Let go of your grip on what you think you believe to be open to a shift in perspective. I promise once you let go, you'll be able to see what had been there the whole time. 


<3